Category Entertainment

Apr 7 2010

Conspiraporn’s List of Things that Piss Me Off: #98

Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

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98) 3-D movies for $15 bucks

You’ve got to be fucking kidding me? OK, the movie AVATAR wasn’t bad for an adult version of ‘The Smurfs’, but if you think that we’re all gonna shell out $15 bucks for an extra pair of glasses you can stick your projector where the sun don’t shine! If people go spend $150 million on ‘Alvin and the Chipmunks III in 3D’, America deserves to be bombed back in to the stone-age by towel headed monkey-bar enthusiasts. In 3 years time they’ll upgrade again and charge us even more, where does it end? How many times do you really need to fucking watch STAR WARS on a big screen, or a generic reinvention of STAR WARS, before you burn the theater down like the finale of INGLORIOUS BASTERDS? Take a stand and boycott $15 dollar movie tickets! For fuck’s sake, boycott ALL Hollywood bullshit and pointless “new and improved” technology from now on. Don’t just follow the trend like some blind jack-ass surfing their lives down the Twitter drain.

Apr 6 2010

Wizard of Oz to Get 3-D Remake

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Inspired by the box office success of Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland, executives at Warner Bros are pressing ahead with an update of the childhood classic.

The studio is weighing up two rival projects which take Frank Baum’s original story as their starting point, and will be very different from the 1939 film starring Judy Garland.

The first is Oz, produced by the team behind the Twilight franchise and aimed at the teen market.

The second, as-yet-untitled film has a darker tone and moves the action closer to the present day, with Dorothy’s granddaughter returning to Oz to fight the forces of evil. The script has been written by Josh Olson, whose previous credits include David Cronenberg’s A History of Violence.

Apr 6 2010

Will You Survive the Zombie Apocalypse?

There is no such thing as safe harbor from Zombies. Over the years they’ve infiltrated peaceful towns, ominous mansions, space, and even Nazi Germany. They can spread their infection like wildfire, survive without their limbs, and they’re always hungry. The odds are not in humanity’s favor, but if you make the right decisions, you might survive the imminent zombie apocalypse.

Apr 6 2010

Jayma Mays For No Reason At All

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So I recently mentioned the super-cute JAYMA MAYS in a different thread here regarding her role in the upcoming SMURF’S MOVIE and wanted to take a moment to come back and touch upon the topic.

Ever since watching her in EPIC MOVIE, followed by PAUL BLART: MALL COP and a few cameos on the TV show HEROES, I’ve been hooked and hoping she’d be given more screen time. Unfortunately, that “more” is currently the hit show GLEE on the FOX NETWORK, and sorry, that’s just not the kind of program I’d watch, even with Jayma in the cast (I’ve seen maybe 10 episodes of AMERICAN IDOL in all these years, and that was by accident). Anyway, long story short: more Jayma Mays please, preferably in skimpy clothing or some hard core sex scenes with Paul Blart on their honeymoon!

In related news, hottie Jayma Mays and SNL hottie Abby Elliott sure do share a striking resemblance! Was Chris Elliott the father of both children?! If so, nice job dude! They should do a movie together, involving a lesbianic relationship if we can somehow work that in the script.

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Apr 6 2010

A Compendium of 150 Monty Python Sketches

“My wife requested that I post a particular Monty Python skit on the site. Well, posting just one Python video is right out!

“No, here at One Man’s Institute for the Exceptional Documentation of Silly Time Wasting Videos we have a rule that one shall post no fewer than 150 videos – and the number of videos posted shall be 150.”