Category Entertainment

Apr 10 2010

Conspiraporn’s List of Things that Piss Me Off: #91

Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

http://minista.files.wordpress.com/2009/09/douchebag.jpg

91) People who create lists

You hear that you bitch! I’m talking to you! Why do you feel the need to make a list of things just because it’s the popular and trendy thing to do? You should be ashamed of yourself, you’re clearly not living up to your full potential and are obviously letting down your family and friends. You must be so proud: “Oh, look at me, I created a list to post on the Internet, I’m so cool!” What a fucking loser your are, deserving of the mockery of the gods. I pity you and spit on your memory! The tombstone of the Internet will be a list of 10 reasons why the Internet collapsed and why our monkey-oppressors are now holding the knife to our throats with devilish glee.  I’m also pissed that THIS DUDE already made a list of 100 things that piss him off! I swear, nothing is original these days.

Apr 10 2010

Conspiraporn’s List of Things that Piss Me Off: #94

Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

https://i0.wp.com/thecount.com/wp-content/uploads/wk15p1_00030_simoncowell_009.jpg

94) Simon Cowell

What more needs to be said? This dude is the reason all religious texts are pointing towards 2012 as the apocalypse. Typical “scathing British” review, with formulaic GONG SHOW ingenuity; AMERICAN IDOL is the reason suicide was invented and David Carradine accidentally hung himself while masturbating in a closet. Simply put, Simon Cowell sucks donkey dicks while America votes for the least horrible and most attractive moron they can find. If he had an action figure based after him it would come with “Satan Cock Guzzling Action!”. Cowell couldn’t even beat an Alzheimer’s patient in a game of checkers at the park bench. For Christ’s sake, Chef Gordon Ramsey has more talent than this man-boobed twit, at least he can cook and cleans your kitchen. It’s shows like these that makes America the most stupidestest nation on earth. It gets you to expect everything while getting nothing besides broken dreams, smelly VD, and a coke addiction.

Apr 8 2010

Peculiar Search Query

So, admittedly, I check in at least a few times a day here to view the CONSPIRAPORN stats, what threads are popular, who is refering us, etc, etc… And I noticed today that there were about a half dozen people who found this website in the past 24 hours looking for the name Yazmin Thornber. Now, I had no idea who this was but upon some Googling found that she recently modeled for the UK magazine/website FRONT (self described as the funniest/sexiest magazine on earth). Anyway, she’s kinda cute so I thought I’d share, though I have no idea why searching her name would bring people to this blog, but I ain’t complaining.

https://i0.wp.com/www.frontarmy.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/YAZMIN-1-530x380.jpg

-CLICK PIC FOR GALLERY (including nudes)-

Apr 7 2010

Conspiraporn’s List of Things that Piss Me Off: #97

Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

https://i0.wp.com/teamyee.tv/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/perezhilton.jpg

97) Perez Hilton

If ever there was a waste of physical and digital space, Perez Hilton would fit that category. With no discernable talent for journalism, art, website design, original thought, or general usefulness, Perez has somehow managed to become a household name (if your household consists of feces throwing apes who are addicted to meth and violent masturbation). I honestly wish that somebody would punch this dude right in the face and steal his Twinkies so they could show it live on TMZ. This goes for 99% of all “reality celebrities” and faggish gossip whores: “YOU SUCK DIRTY ASSHOLES FOR A LIVING!” Live it up cum-rags, in a couple years you’ll be on ‘Good Morning America’ with snot on your nose and tears in your eyes, begging for forgiveness like Jimmy Swaggert after you got caught fucking that underage, transvestite goat.