Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

97) Perez Hilton

If ever there was a waste of physical and digital space, Perez Hilton would fit that category. With no discernable talent for journalism, art, website design, original thought, or general usefulness, Perez has somehow managed to become a household name (if your household consists of feces throwing apes who are addicted to meth and violent masturbation). I honestly wish that somebody would punch this dude right in the face and steal his Twinkies so they could show it live on TMZ. This goes for 99% of all “reality celebrities” and faggish gossip whores: “YOU SUCK DIRTY ASSHOLES FOR A LIVING!” Live it up cum-rags, in a couple years you’ll be on ‘Good Morning America’ with snot on your nose and tears in your eyes, begging for forgiveness like Jimmy Swaggert after you got caught fucking that underage, transvestite goat.