CONSPIRAPORN’S LIST OF THINGS THAT PISS ME OFF: #90

Surely there are 100 things I could list that piss me off

90) Spammers

As I write this, I’ve got this D-Bag spam machine who is polluting my website with endless dick pictures and viagra bullshit. Once a year or so he crawls out of his pedophilic torture chamber of delights and starts posting an abundance of porn-viagra adds at my forum. However, this time, the fucker has gone spam crazy (obviously he’s found a new spamming toy to utilize) and is posting 20, 30, 40+ spam messages a day, all with the same cum-guzzling chicks eating dong, with titles like “Grandpaw’s Lucky Day”, and “Donkey Dick Fantasies Come To Life”. Every other word is mis-spelled, and he’s relentlessly making a huge annoyance of himself. Here is a message to spammers like this everywhere: YOU ARE GOING TO FUCKING DIE. No questions asked, simultaneously, every mass-spammer in the world is going to spontaneously combust in a fire of genital putrification and a tormentingly bloody bout of erectile mortification. In other words, the Devil’s Fire is gonna jump out of your tiny little dicks and consume you in a blaze of torture for all eternity. Dante is going to create a special ring of hell just for you to grovel and crawl in. Have fun in the pit, bitch-faces!